Dear Ruth

Dear Ruth,

I have been with my man Peter Noel Melville for donkeys years, but to say that things aren’t entirely working out between us is a gross understatement. Things with Peter and I haven’t really been rosy for some time now, but you know how we Trini women like to stand by our men through thick and thin and give them the benefit of the doubt. However, over the last eighteen months or so, things have really come to a boil, and I have now reached the stage where I don’t think I can deal with this any more. Now don’t get me wrong Ruth, because Peter is not a violent man by any stretch. Despite what people say about his controlling nature, I still have the freedom to say what I want, and believe me I does pelt some good cuss in his ass when I’m ready. But what Peter doesn’t do to me physically, he more than makes up for with mental and emotional torment. Honestly Ruth, this man wasn’t always so, but over the years he started liming with a certain crew, and is now almost unrecognisable from the smart, young, dashing man that I fell in love with all those years ago.

Peter had a partner Calder, who came down from Canada and was staying by us for a little while. No word of a lie Ruth, as soon as Calder came into my house, money started going missing. I bit my tongue in the beginning because to be fair, Peter had Calder doing some work fixing up the house, and with Christmas coming and all, I was glad for the little help to make the place look nice. However, when I told Peter what was happening after Christmas, he simply didn’t believe me. Imagine, my own man, after all these years, thinking that I am a liar. Peter had a really good friend called Keith who lives in Diego Martin; the two of them practically grew up together. One day Keith pulled Peter square and told him that Calder was stealing from him too. Peter ketch a vaps one time and started accusing Keith of liking too much bacchanal and wajang thing. To this day, Keith and Peter still don’t speak to each other because of that scene.

But as God would have it Ruth, last week Peter came home from work to see Calder rummaging through the chest-of-drawers in the master bedroom. Ruth girl, is a long time I haven’t seen Peter that angry. He grab up Calder and told him to get the so and so out of his so and so house before he so and so damage him. Girl, I was real scared for Calder yes. But he didn’t say a word; he just packed up his things and left quietly- I heard that he has since gone back to Canada. You wouldn’t believe that after Calder left, Peter’s sister Emily had the temerity to come in front of my gate and tell me that I should be ashamed of the way I treated Calder. My children had to hold me back yes girl...

But it’s not just the whole episode with Calder and Emily that leaves me feeling frustrated Ruth; I just don’t know where Peter’s priorities lie anymore. Sometime last year I came home from work to find that Peter had spruced up the entire front garden; he had cut the lawn, pruned the trees and painted the driveway. I asked Peter what was going on and he told me that he had some friends coming down from foreign, and that he was making the place look presentable for them. Ruth, when I asked Peter if in this guava season we could really afford the expense of having so many people over at once; with the costs involved in showing them a good time, feeding and lodging them, he told me to mind my own business. Some of his friends came from as far away as Africa and Asia, and by all accounts, they had a really good time. But it hurt me like hell to know that as Peter was renting out cars by Kalloos and paying for his partners to have dinner in the Hyatt, we barely had enough water in the house for the children to brush their teeth. Ruth, you feel this man right here.

I mean, all the showing off to the outside world and yet when it rains, those children and I have to be shovelling water out of the living room. I can just imagine how the neighbours laugh and snigger behind their curtains as they look at us. But Peter no longer seems to care. The other day he got a pain in one of his kidneys and we didn’t even have aspirin in the house Ruth...aspirin!!! Peter ended up having to go and beg some from the Cuban fella up the road. Now, I have been inside that Cuban fella’s house on two occasions and you could really see that they ketching they nennen. Imagine that we now having to beg from them! People could say what they want about Raul- about how he does beat his wife and thing, but when it comes to the health of his kids, the man never skylarks. However, while all our children have Blackberries and Iphones, God help them if they should catch so much as a cold!

I think that you may have guessed it by now Ruth because it is often the case in these things- There is somebody else who has caught my eye. It didn’t just happen overnight, but he has been paying me attention [at least it feels that way] while Peter has repeatedly taken me for granted. Truth be told Ruth, I did in fact leave Peter for him quite a while back but things ended up turning sour and I went back to Peter. But now this guy’s back and wants me to leave Peter for good. He says that he’s changed but hasn’t really said how he plans to look after my children and me. Ruth, I really do not know what to do now. I will tell you more about him when I write next week. His name? Umar Nigel Chalsingh...

Fed up but confused...

post by the prophet...